ROMNEY/RYAN? HAHAHA! THEY ARE TOO LATE!
Our Dear Beloved Leader, Hosanna Hosanna Bama, has skillfully and compassionately driven us right to the very edge of the Cliffs of Fiscal Insanity for He is a man of vision and leadership. It is now up to us. Our choices are only two: jump for Obama or get pushed off by the Republicans.
Hosanna Hosanna Bama believes in us. He believes in our goodness. He believes that we will do the right thing and JUMP FOR OBAMA. Not WITH him, mind you, he will stay behind to make sure all is well, but certainly we will be jumping with those evil 1%'ers because our death is as nothing if we can destroy people who have lots more than----okay...so maybe they will stay behind, too...but we will definitely be jumping with those HENRYs, that's for DAMN sure because they are the one group in America that has enough money to cause envy but not enough to buy off our
Come on! All good Democrats, Crybabies and Scaredy Cats know that there is only one way out of this fiscal crisis and it is to trust Hosanna Hosanna Bama and Saint Joseph the Traveler (with all that foreign policy experience) to guide us to the Promised Land on the rocks below. Only with Democrats can we be be assured that massive spending and debt is the answer to our prayers even though this has proven disastrous for every country in history who has ever tried it. Hosanna Hosanna Bama is different. Hosanna Hosanna Bama cares. And all good Democrats know that caring is much more powerful than math.
Instead of abandoning the principle of "I want it all while someone else pays for it", a principle that is demonstrably older and more ingrained in human history than the principle of "I must earn what I have and not envy the success of others", now is the moment when we must re-commit and JUMP FOR OBAMA or those evil Republicans could force us to behave like adults. How dare they?
The choice is clear. If any doubts remain, this should lay them to rest.
The Republicans are truly insane. As a nation we stand on the Cliffs of Fiscal Insanity, fellow citizens, and the Republicans expect us to act sanely. This must not happen! Now is our moment! We are the ones we've been waiting for! The oceans are rapidly receding and the rocks are exposed below! Jump, stupid!