Sunday, February 28, 2016

Friday, February 26, 2016

The Upside

The only good thing I can think of about a Trump presidency is that it's not likely he will be messing around with fat interns in the Oval Office.

I Will Funk You Up!

I will funk you up!

Just when you thought there couldn't be another one of these...your prayers are answered!

Speaking of funking people up, Rubio and Cruz seriously funked up The Donald in last night's GOP debate like he was a stuffed toy being shared by two pit bulls. I can't stand pit bulls, but this time I was cheering them on.

The debate was a cage fight. I kept expecting to see blood just suddenly splatter across my television screen. I almost felt sorry for Kasich and Carson, waiting on the sidelines to be tagged and allowed in the cage. Rubio and Cruz were having too much fun knocking the living crap out of The Donald to let anyone else play. It will certainly be interesting to see how the chattering classes and the talking heads assess the damage today. And the American people. Please...oh PLEASE GOD! make them smarter than they seem to be at the moment!!



All of your wildest dreams will come true.

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Utopia - Where It's All About Me and Nothing Really Matters

Others, many others, have set out the numerous differences between liberals and conservatives, and their systems, socialism and capitalism (or statism and individualism). So it is with some trepidation that I will add my two cents worth to the discussion.

There are those, including moi, who make endless fun of liberals because...EASY! But making fun of something isn't always convincing. Especially within the canon of liberalism which gains its great power by appealing to a peculiar kind of religious certainty, even as they typically dismiss religion as mere superstition.

This is not hard to understand. As humans, we are wired to be religious. Being able to understand the finality of death, we are unavoidably faced with the questions its inevitably raises. Where did I come from? Why am I here? Where will I go? These questions, and their answers, lie at the heart of any religion. Ultimately, and this is why there are so many religions, these are not easy questions with concrete answers. They are questions that must be faced and then reconciled with the fact that no one really knows. This leaves one with either fear or faith; many of us resign ourselves to a little bit of both. The degree to which these questions propel us between fear and faith has, in my opinion, a great deal to do with how humble we are. To be faced with one's mortality and to choose humility is the beginning of faith. Alternatively, when one chooses, instead, the force of one's ego to address these eternal questions, one is left helpless and fearful -- because the ego has no answers at all.

Liberalism is a philosophy of arrogance and ego. It does not question itself or its actions. I see no humility in liberalism. Even when I can clearly see compassion or concern for others, there is no humility in their ideas. There cannot be in a system that presumes that some men are sufficiently superior to direct the lives of others.

But such a delicious distraction it is for those who presume to know! To be busily directing the lives and fortunes of others due to the urgency of present need! Who can be expected to care where one came from or where one is going when so many need so much right now? The fear of uncertainty is avoided by simply refusing to ask the questions. Only the second question, why am I here? remains valid. And having banished humility along with the more fearful questions, they then set about answering the second question with iron-fisted ferocity. This is the real lure of liberalism. It sets the religious impulse free from the restraints of humility.
Once this is done the ego of man is entirely in charge and assumes the role with the absolute conviction of moral good. This releases the more deadly aspect of the ego: to want without any effort, to lust and to covet and desire. It is no coincidence that of the Ten Commandments, God felt it necessary to have FIVE of them deal with keeping your hands, eyes, words, and thoughts inside the ride at all times.

See? What did I tell you?

This dark and constant part of humanity is what liberalism appeals to and what it gleefully unleashes. Fear and a lack of humility drive those who would organize the system. Greed and avarice drive those who would be slaves to the system. And this is why the poison of liberalism will always be with us. It is inside us, fed by fear and buoyed by ego. God saw this. He knew it. He commanded us to resist it.

Another Bible saying is "It is better to give than to receive." This always struck me as nonsensical as a kid, because if everyone was giving, than everyone was also receiving. Which was actually better, therefore, became a moot point. However, in my old age, I've realized that if you take away the GIVE part, you destroy the RECEIVE part and the whole idea collapses. This is at the heart of why conservatism (capitalism) creates wealth and prosperity, while liberalism (socialism) creates need and poverty. In capitalism, in order for me to be successful and attain my own dreams, I have to somehow find a way to meet another's needs, dreams, desires. I must think of what I can GIVE. Of course, they, then, must give me an equal exchange in value, whether it is money or everyone is giving and everyone is receiving. The saying holds up, and prosperity and advancement are the results. But in socialism, I no longer am required to care what your needs are; giving to you is not necessary, receiving from you is the order of the day. Free education. Free healthcare. Free Obama phones. The GIVE part breaks down because no one is particularly concerned with that. They don't need to be. The RECEIVE part quickly dries up, however, because there is nothing to receive. This breakdown takes a little longer to materialize in real life because there we also have the ability to MAKE people give through the power of the state. Of course, it's just "their fair share.

Giving is an expression of who you are and what you can do; receiving is simply the satisfying of desires and needs. In balance, they create a perfect synergy. Out of balance, the whole thing breaks. Giving makes you a good person. Receiving doesn't. But liberals care not about what makes men good; in fact, they would be horrified at the suggestion that they should. They place all their moral impulse on meeting the physical needs of others, without understanding that receiving without giving creates fear, greed, despair, and unhappiness.

So let's imagine, for a moment, if the ideas of liberals actually took us to the promised land of Utopia. It would be a world, I imagine, where everything was taken care of for you, where all your needs were met -- a world of only receiving. A world where giving would have no purpose because no one would have any need of anything you had to give. 

This would be a world where no one had any value to any other person. Oh, there would be those who would be nice to each other, people would have friends, many would marry, as is always the case in any society. But in each person's heart there would be the knowledge that if they died, it would not matter, because their life didn't really matter. And in each heart would remain those eternal questions, only now, no one would have any way to address them. Where did we come from? It doesn't matter. Why are we here? It doesn't matter. Where will we go? It doesn't matter.

What we do matters. What we are able to do for others matters. Doing these things in a world where the outcome is uncertain matters. Rising about difficulties matters. Becoming someone stronger, better, wiser, more talented, more able to give matters. It all matters.

In a perfect Utopia, nothing would matter. It would be all about you...and you would find that you don't matter.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Horse is not amused.

Despite the phrase "horse laugh", horses rarely find humans amusing.

Pretty Kitty

Farm Boy bought me a new car. This is a YUGE event in our house as we own our cars for decades. My cars always become something like family, with nicknames and personalities, and I find it hard to let them go. So when it clearly was time to trade in the Lexus sedan for something that, you know, drove, I struggled with actually making the decision. My car had been a stalwart and loyal companion and I felt that I was in some way abandoning him in his last days. It reminded me of a little film that I bought when my son was a toddler - The Brave Little Toaster. It was a Parents' Choice Award
Winner! Well, the parents who chose this little horror movie must have been Alec Baldwin and Geena Davis. The first time I watched it with our son, he had nightmares for weeks, and he never again liked the vacuum cleaner. Farm Boy and I used to joke that we should take it out of the closet and put it in his room after he had gone to sleep. AS A JOKE! WE WERE JOKING! We would never do anything like that. We loved our own sleep too much for those kinds of tricks.

Anyway, this movie was terrifying - filled with abandonment and death, and creepy little appliances. But the scene at the end where the cars get "killed" came vividly to mind when I had to leave my car at the dealers lot.

So I sadly, and with no small measure of guilt, left my car to his fate and drove off in my new car.

That should be the end of the story, except most of my stories have something to do with annoying, stupid people, and this is no exception. My new car is a Jaguar, and I do love, love LOVE it. It purrs like a kitten, kittens, and it suits me, I think. However, what has become a sincere struggle since acquiring it is the incredible number of dicks that have suddenly erupted on the highways of California! Despite the fact that this car is white, it is like waving a red flag in front of bulls. Men in everything from trucks to Toyota Corollas are now drag racing me, tailgating me, swerving to pass me. My little kitty brings out the beast in them.

Of course I thought it was just me, because I do have a tendency to give driving lessons to stupid people, but today my even-tempered and speed-limit-following Farm Boy mentioned he felt like he was in a Death Race 2000 outtake every time he drove the Jag. He was getting ready to leave for Southern California to spend a week at the Grand Prix International show jumping in the desert, when I asked if he wanted to drive the new car. "No way. It's too much stress. You can't drive that thing 10 miles without someone trying to kill you just to get around you. Everybody wants to race you."

So, for once in my life, it wasn't just me. The world really had become filled with assholes. And they are probably all voting for Trump.

Shakespeare for Horse Lovers

I'm Voting Third Party

Let the stupid people win. Maybe, when the whole thing is burning down around us, the stupid people will be chagrined into submission for awhile and the rest of us can get back to building this country.

Or maybe not...either way, I'm having a Manhattan.

The Revenge of the Stupid

For decades I have been convinced that half the country are stone cold morons, or liberals, as they prefer to describe themselves. But the other half, those who align with conservative values, allowed me to retain some glimmer of hope that this country would always manage to stagger on grandly under the constant onslaught of social engineering, politically-driven programs, and innumerable fancy-schmancy ideas on how to usher in Utopia without having to kill 25 million or so of our fellow citizens.

But now I'm casting a seriously horrified side eye at the majority of my fellow countrymen -- askance, I tell you! I'm looking askance! -- and wondering if there is any point in doing anything except drinking.

Hillary, have you had work done?
A little Botox...perhaps a brow lift?
When you have the Democrats running an incompetent old man who spent his youth writing porn, his middle years no doubt watching it instead of listening to Senate proceedings because he certainly wasn't doing anything useful, and now, in his aged and senile years, who wants to run the whorehouse...err...I mean WHITE House...against an incompetent old woman who spent her youth plotting her rise to power through her husband's "charm", tasted power with all the avarice of Gollum while First Lady (WE are the president!), attacked, covered-up and maligned women who had been abused by the aforementioned husband, then used her influence at the State Department to enrich herself to the tune of hundreds of millions of dollars while managing to lose track of BILLIONS of dollars of taxpayer money, abandoning good men to their valiant death for a political calculation, all the while possibly exposing state secrets to the enemy on an unsecured server because she was more worried about Americans learning what she was up to than the Chinese or Russians, you have a hot mess, but one in which I would have expected to be enjoying myself immensely!

Because, at first glance, the lunacy of the Democrats would appear to be a perfect setup for an astonishing, historic, BIBLICAL trouncing by the Republicans this November. But au contraire, kittens. You would be wrong. Because in the very midst of delicious, hysterical Democrat Party Insanity, we've gone quite mad as well.

Mr. Donald Trump and his inexplicable candidacy are irrefutable proof that America, as a country, as an idea, as an experiment in self-government exploring the possibility that the average man isn't quite as average as history might have shown, is proving that no, no, the average man is really quite an unexceptional dumbass. As dumb as dumb can be. Worthlessly stupid. Painfully stupid. Stupid spelled any way you please.

So choose...which will it be?

And kiss America good bye.

In the meantime, there is still fun to be had on placing bets. Who wants to bet that in a Trump vs Clinton face off, we will be faced with voting for a guy up on fraud charges or a soulless harpy indicted for federal crimes? THAT would be fun!

Or in a Trump vs Sanders contest we could watch them fight over the poorly educated and those who don't care if people get shot. We already KNOW socialists don't give a shit about killing people who aren't on board with the Grand Plan, and now we have Trump bragging that his supporters don't give a shit either. So let's start shooting! It'll be fun!

But still...even with all the fun, may I politely submit my notepad? Now, I'm going to pour myself a drink.

Monday, February 8, 2016

Best. Interview. Ever.

Where to start? I know...I can't even start articulating the sheer genius of this video until you choke down the laughter and wipe away the tears. I'll give you a minute....

Love. This. So. Much.