Tuesday, July 31, 2012

They Took The Words Right Out Of My Mouth

Joan of Argghh! at Primordial Slack and Velociman at Velociworld review the opening ceremony of the Olympics. I have been struggling with whether I would write anything, as I really love the Olympic Games for the level of competition and the unique place they hold in history, but...DAMN! They are so right.

It must be said.

My daughter and I were equal parts quizzical, confused, hysterical and horrified as we watched. It was an S&M masturbatory orgy of self-flagellation that gave us the “story” of how Western man once lived in a bucolic paradise until he destroyed it with the industrial revolution and ruined everything, driving the people from the beautiful farms to the dirty, sordid cities where they lived desperate lives until government rescued them from the greedy capitalists (who had destroyed the planet and brought world wars in pursuit of profit) and gave them freeeeeeeee health care. We couldn’t decide whether to laugh, cry or puke.

 Behold! Paradise with fake clouds.  Everybody's happy in Paradise despite having to work their entire lives scratching out a living and dying young, broken and tired. They had cleaner air. 


And they danced a lot of virginal rites.

Then man's mind got busy and discovered ways to make things EASIER through the invention of machinery and industrialization and all bloody hell broke loose. What a disaster THAT was. People started enjoying free time, getting an education, and actually living longer.

But the government fixed that with the NHS. 

THE END







4 comments:

  1. British entertainment hasn't been the same since Benny Hill passed away. He would have been the perfect choice for the opening ceremony.

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    1. LOVED Benny Hill! There's no classic so classic as a dirty old man. Can't be improved on.

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  2. David Mamet tells of his wife saying: "Grow up, David! Everyone who buys a newspaper does it so they can spout off their worldview."

    Extrapolating: "Everyone who produces an Olympics ceremony ....

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    1. I adore David Mamet. He's one of the greatest writers and playwrights alive. AND he's a recent convert to conservatism, so he's smart, too!!

      Usually when my husband tells me to "grow up!" it's because I'm hitting something with the newspaper, not reading it.

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