Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Studies prove that everything you do while driving is dangerous


Apparently hurtling along in a steel cage at 65 (okay...in my case, 80) miles per hour among other hurtling steel cages inhabited by frank idiots, many of whom have never discovered the cutting edge technology of a turn signal yet are nonetheless weaving in and out of tiny holes accidentally left between these cages by other inattentive idiots is dangerous. Who knew?

This is always my best rebuttal.
No one. That's why we need studies. Duh!


NEW STUDY SHOWS DANGERS OF SINGING WHILE DRIVING


NEW YORK (WABC) -- Who doesn't like to belt out a tune every once in a while when they're behind the wheel?

Singing and driving is not only distracting, it may also make you a worse driver. That's according to a new Australian study. It finds that singing requires more mental activity, taking your attention off the road. 
Researchers tested the singing and driving abilities of 21 people by using a driving simulator.

The singing drivers were less likely to notice peripheral distractions and their speeds varied more . 
"As you might guess, driving performance changes when you're listening to music and singing. You actually tend to slow down," said Scott Bea with Cleveland Clinic. 
The study found the same distracting effect for those just listening to music, even if they didn't sing along.

Closely related to this finding from Australia is this study out of Britain.

Men's accident rates climb with women's hemlines

The London Telegraph said the study by car insurance company Sheilas' Wheels claims men get into more accidents in the summer because they are distracted by women's skimpy outfits. 
The study shows that 29 percent of men admitted being distracted by short skirts and low-cut tops in summer weather, leading to record numbers of accidents on the roads, the Telegraph said.

Cell phones were dangerous. So they took them.
Singing is dangerous. So shut UP!
Clothing is dangerous. So wear more.

Stupidity is dangerous, kittens. And stupidity at high speeds can be deadly.

I swear I'm going to put together a proposal to study whether having kids throwing ice cream at each other effects driving safety. Someone will give me money to find that out.

In the meantime, this is what inattention will get you, so look alive, people.

I'm sure this is code for more than just stupid people.
Maybe they were responding to a dog whistle.






26 comments:

  1. My experience is that most people can[t unitask adequately to merely drive. Adding multiple other tasks makes the original ne more difficult.

    If you can drive a stick, eat a cheeseburger, text Mom, and apply makeup at the same time with no appreciable loss of control of your motor vehicle, God bless you. If you have issues breathing while walking, you might want to keep the phone in the purse and drive a car with an automatic and only one big red idiot light in the dashboard instead of all those confusing gauges.

    One way or the nother, the gummint doesnt belong in it, either studyying it, or making it illegal. The stupid weed themselves out, we should get out of their way and let nature take it's course.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Og, you and I are on the same page. Driving is a sport. There are winners and losers.

      Delete
    2. You don't even know what driving is until you go to China. Or rather, you don't know what RUNNING is. Sir Isaac Newton has the right of way in all circumstances. Even the bus drivers seemed to be taking gleeful aim at my three young boys. I guess when you've got 1.3 billion people, what the fuck, eh?

      Delete
    3. I've BEEN driven in South Korea (not bad), Hong Kong, (not great), India (kinda terrifying) Egypt (WTF?) and others, but never been to mainland China.

      I sort of have an idea of the chaos. You just have to sit there and start mentally figuring the statistical likelihood of death or maiming. HAHA!

      Delete
    4. Just wait until you are driven around Dublin by an Italian. This was 30 years ago so there is a (very slight) chance that Irish drivers have overall improved, since presumably they are no longer handing out full driving licenses to those who have simply renewed their learner permit at least once. (Happened in the early 80s because they got backlogged over a year on driving tests.)

      If you weren't religious before the experience, you were afterwords. Though in all fairness I should say that the Italian in question was actually quite a good driver, and the Irish scared him a bit.

      Delete
    5. Library-Gryffon, what time were you driving? Leaving the pub at 1 am is going to up the handicap considerably!

      Delete
  2. Welcome to the internet. Any friend of Og must be good enough to not need to be burned to the ground and the ashes spread on a filled in sewage pit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think I should say thank you. And resist the impulse to duck while saying it....

      Delete
    2. I would definitely duck anyway if Og is at all involved..
      :)

      Delete
    3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

      Delete
    4. HAHAHA! Good advice. But I do have my frying pan....

      Delete
  3. One comforting thought is that few progressives drive, since that would require a photo identification, which would be like a poll tax or being tortured with red hot pokers.

    So, we're safer and that calls for singing, while eating a cheeseburger and texting how wonderful life is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. RACIST!!! Showing ID is racist!!! I heard that dog whistle.

      I feel a song coming on..... Oh...no! I think I swallowed my squeaker!

      Delete
  4. Oh, Buttercup! You've changed your blog's subtitle to my very favorite PJ quote! And there are MANY to choose from.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Isn't PJ the BEST?!?!? I ravenously devour every one of his books, giggling to myself all the way through. No one, and I mean NO ONE, has the same acidic wit and unflinching insight.

      I love that liberals don't "get" him. HAHAHA!

      Delete
  5. I did notice that the the "darker" colored dog was chasing the white dog, thus reinforcing negative stereotypes about angry, uh, dark dogs. AND that it was clearly the "dark" dog that was made to look foolish. So, really, not so subtle, there, hatery hater.

    Dog whistle, indeed.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cheeze, you picked right up on the subtler details. There is also the crushing imagery of a WHITE dog that can jump higher than a dark dog. The ol' white dogs can't jump shit is thrown on the grrroooouuunnndd! There! HAHAHA!

      The saddest, silliest part of this whole dog whistle racism is that the left just sees our JOKES as more evidence. They will never let go of this. It's all they've got.

      Delete
    2. Huh, I thought the darker dog was the boy dog there just following the 'skirt'. I have failed my code for the day.

      And polling the men, how many of us read "Clothing is dangerous..." and were disappointed when the next line wasn't wear none?

      Delete
    3. "Clothing is dangerous..." and were disappointed when the next line wasn't wear none?

      HAHAHAHA! I even thought that when I wrote it, but honestly how could that lead to fewer accidents? Hmmmmm?

      Delete
    4. Oh it couldn't...it couldn't. But we can all do a Beavis chuckle and say: "Huh, huh, she said naked."

      Delete
  6. After the head of the NTSB was recommending banning all cell phone use, even hands free, I thought about writing him and asking if he was planning on banning all conversation in cars, since I find talking to someone actually in the car is more distracting that talking on the phone while driving, since on the phone, I don't unconsciously find myself turning to try to observe facial cues.

    And then they need to ban kids from cars. I guarantee you that having two preteens fighting in the back seat is more distracting than *any* cell phone call.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And eating in the car. And adjusting the air conditioning or the heat.

      Mark my words. They will eventually ban cars. Remember I said that when it happens.

      Delete
    2. I suspect they will ban kids first.

      Admittedly there were a few years there when we really wanted an old style London taxi cab with soundproof glass between the back and front seats, and preferably deviding the back seat it two also.....

      My other peeve is watching the state police go blasting by using a hand-held cell. It's illegal for me to do it, they aren't better drivers than I am (one accident on my record, backed out of the drive after a blizzard because I am considered "essential personnel", hit an ice patch, and slid slowly into the car parked across the very narrow street), and lord knows we're paying enough for town and statie cruisers that we wouldn't notice any extra charges for having built-in hands-free.

      Delete
  7. I am so glad these studies have been done. Really stupid people can feel so much safer with this info. It really is too bad that a lefty is unable to get irony(much less sarcasm). There are so many good ones(loved the summary comment about abortion and future generations on Rachel's blog, BTW).

    It is liberals that do these studies, presumably to help stupid people survive. But it is liberals who scoff in contempt at the idea of a creator and put all stock in Darwinism.

    It is liberal to hate stereotypes and 'educate' people as to their hurtfulness, but in liberal run TV, especially comedy, stereotypes are virtually all that is out there.

    It is liberals who feel that charity cannot be trusted and therefore destroy the meaning of the term by forcibly collectivising it. I know more than one who believes that churches are essentially small models of the Gov't and that their collectivisation is the same.

    Aren't they the ones who need a God that will save them from stupidity, other people's hate and lack of charity? Irony, great stuff.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hear! Hear!

      If liberals "got" irony they would spend all their time laughing at themselves...and then they would have to stop being liberals because they couldn't get anything done for all the laughing.

      Delete
    2. Not that they get much done as it is.

      Delete