Sunday, April 29, 2012

WANT AD FOR A KICK-ASS SUMMER JOB

Sandra Fluke need not apply. Health insurance benefits not included.

NEEDED: KICK-ASS SUMMER NANNY


Perhaps best known for the sandbox full of cat shit in our front yard and our “not-in-compliance-with-village-health-ordinance” colony of rescue bats, we are now prepared to add one AWESOME nanny to our team. Are you that special someone who can do all the holistic parenting we would like to, were it not for our crippling student loans, a Groupon for a pasta-making class, and some stuff we want to do on the computer later?

Some of you have probably seen our ad before. PLEASE READ CAREFULLY as we’ve updated many of our requirements. Experience and a lawsuit have taught us to be really, really specific and to disclose when we are filming you in the bathroom or implanting a tiny tracking device under your skin. Read on...

If the perfect candidate doesn't answer the ad, there is always the possibility one could hire these young girls. I'm betting they haven't been employed for awhile.




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