I am just too darn nice.
I am nice to friends who borrow expensive tools and never return them, I am nice to the asshole at the ATM apparently attempting to refinance his house, I am nice to the child in the movie theater during a screening of ARGO, squirming and talking loudly because the adult movie was way over his head and he didn't care one little whit about any of it. (Parents...hel-loooooo?)
I am too nice.
And when one is too nice, other people have no boundaries, no clearly defined lines in the dirt, no rules of engagement. So they do whatever the hell they feel like.
And it's not going to be wasting time being considerate of me.
I have taken nice to a level where people feel no obligation whatsoever to give a tiny little shit about me. They simply expect me to "be nice."
The unavoidable and depressingly real result of being too nice is that
other people feel that it is perfectly within their right to take
advantage of you and if you say anything, if you expect them to be more
responsible or more considerate, YOU are the bad guy because society
values your "niceness" and your "tolerance" more than it values their consideration or maturity. And they know that.
And when it gets to the point where even the most dull-witted realize that they are stepping all over you, they pull out the "I've been so busy" card. Well, that wipes the slate clean, doesn't it? You've been busy. I certainly have no right to expect you to live up to your promises and obligations, what with you being so busy and all. Then when I have to make time in my day, day after day, to do what you won't, my life's "busyness" is not an issue. Somehow, my time isn't as valuable as yours.
Can you tell I'm not happy?
I am currently in a spot where, without giving any details and certainly without naming names, I have stepped up, ponied up, put up, and shut up until I'm FED UP. But I'm nice. Too nice. So I do not speak up. So I am getting used up. And I'm afraid I might blow up. But for now, I'll just drink up.
But I do think my situation is analogous to our society today. We are all expected to put up with much that we don't approve of, much we don't agree with, much that we believe is damaging and harmful, but if we speak out, if we speak up, we are called names and denigrated as horrible people. And those holding all the cards, those making the accusations of racism or homophobia or xenophobia or whatever, are the ones doing whatever the hell they want and expecting the nice people who have been cowed into silence to just keeping putting up with whatever they dish out.
I'm crawling into The Drinking Closet now. If you want to join me, then YOU have to be nice. I'm all "niced" out.